Safeway? Co-op? Pfffftttttt....

Have you guys ever tried a grocery-delivery service? I think I may consider it after I move, mainly because I'm pretty sick and tired of the grocery store.

I usually go to the store on my lunch hour, which falls between 2 and 3PM, which you'd think would be the best time of the day to go. Sike..... There's never a good time to go to the grocery store.

I'm pretty good at the actual "picking out food and putting it in the basket", I even make a list before I go. However, I am no good at supermarket etiquette. For example, when you're in an aisle, and there's three old guys clogging up the isle, is it okay to want to scream obscenities at them? Being in my line of work, I like to think I'm a pretty patient person, but even I get a little bit amped-up when I'm tring to push my way to the checkout counter. Also, if there's a tall old lady in the aisle, and you want something that's super high on the shelves, is it okay to force her to reach it for you, even after she gives you a bitchy look when you ask her nicely?
As well, it's way too hard to try to figure out which line is going to be the least retarded. For example, if the lineups are all roughly equal in length, which is the best one to stand in? I have never chosen the right lineup in my life. Let's say there's three lineups: one has three old ladies in it, one has three moms with children in the carts, and one has single middle-aged males. Of course you're going to choose the line with the single dudes in it. However, if I were to choose the line with the single guys, then one of the guys would decide to have a cellphone conversation in the middle of the transaction, one would want to chat up the cashier, and one would forget something and want the cashier to go fetch him cigarettes. Goooo figure.

So, once I make my big move, I think I'm going to pay someone to do my shopping for me. It's going to be way less stressful, and it'll make me feel like a balla.

~sarah p.

p.s. My dear hippie Dad, who holds firm to the belief that advice is redundant, rarely ever offers me tidbits of fatherly wisdom. However, this one time when I was living with him in Victoria, he turned to me and said: "Don't go to the grocery store when you're high". Thanks, Dad.

p.p.s. Food Lion? Piggly Wiggly? The South has the best names for grocery stores ever.