Hey guys, I know I fuck around a lot and make a lot of jokes, but once in a while I like to get a tiny bit serious. Don't doubt me when I say this, because it's totally true: I will be marrying Lionel Ritchie (and ending the marriage shortly afterward).
For 300 G's a month in alimony, I can deal with the fact that Teeny McSkelator will be my stepdaughter (for a bit, before the d-i-v-o-r-c-e).
I can also deal with the fact that my *cough* husband released one of my least favorite videos of all time, Hello (however, he was in the Commodores, which almost makes up for it... Almost).
So, yep, I'm going to go all Anna Nicole on Lionel, marry for money, and make myself a fortune. Being poor is getting tiresome.
~sarah p.
p.s. Man, oh, man. I love GST cheques. It's not even that much money, but when you go to your mailbox and look inside, and there's something other than bills and Pizza 73 flyers, it's kind-of a nice feeling.
p.p.s. Dear Lionel Ritchie, if you are reading this, I swear I'll never hurt you, baby. I'll never try to divorce you and take your money. Never. I'll love you for who you are. Just believe me, baby. Please?
4 comments:
"Run Lionel its a TRAP!!"
I hope he will sing "Say You Say Me" at your wedding, if he doesn't I will do a nice karoke rendition at a mexican bar ;)
Nicole, it really doesn't matter who I marry... Even if it was the best singer in the world, I would really love for you to sing, karaoke-style, at my wedding (several songs, but more than anything I would like to hear 'Brick House, and then 'You Can Call Me Al').
Please and thanks.
~sarah p.
p.s. Anticipated wedding date? October 1st, 2048.
hey honey... we are getting married and I'll support you, my little canadian housewife... yeah and if you send me your addrewss i can send you something other than a bill
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