Sweet. My answer is GET OUT OF MY KITCHEN.

Don't even bother trying to call me tonight.... Between The Hills season premiere and Hell's Kitchen finale, I'll have no time for chit-chat.

...Actually, it's totally okay to call me, but please call during breaks, and keep conversations to the following topics:

-Can Spencer be any more of a dick?
-Heidi: Do fake boobs and a nosejob ensure a solid career in the music industry?
-Why Whitney should probably just branch off and get her own show.
-L.C. : A plethora of great outfit ideas.
-Gordon Ramsay's insults: much less inventive when he's frazzled.
-Why is Bonnie in the finals with Rock anyway?

Thanks in advance for your consideration during this important evening.

~sarah p.

Gum.

I was going to write some sort of post about gum, because I'm totally into chewing gum lately (and blowing bubbles! Oh man.), but this morning I decided that the idea was really, really terrible. Then, I went to my parent's house tonight and drank a bottle and a half of wine, and throughout the night, the post started seeming like a progressively good idea again.

Basically, the post was going to say that the best gum for blowing bubbles is Hubba Bubba Max, the worst is Juicy Fruit (in stick-form), Fruit-Stripe gum is rad, and that watermelon gum sucks. That's it......Except for it would be interjected with a bunch of pathetic attempts at being entertaining.

....It's a good thing I got all sluggish after a couple of intoxicated hours, or you woulda had to read that shit.

Have a great weekend, guys.

~sarah p.