Monday, July 26, 2010

You think you've had a bad day?

This guy got busted, on COPS, for having sex in his truck. Next to a playground. With his (currently incarcerated) brother's wife. Who was fifteen years his junior.

I was watching a particularly rousing episode of COPS a few weeks ago, aptly titled "Stupid Behavior #3".
The cops pull up to the bumper of this old pickup, where there's a bunch of blurred blobs of skin, jumbling around in the cab. The driver's window opens, and a man's voice asks if he can get dressed. The man emerges wearing a neon orange t-shirt, and dangerously short cutoffs. A meek woman saunters out behind him, wearing a man's button-down shirt and no pants. The woman is terrified, she asks the cops if they have to "tell her folks" about the arrest. "Yes", nods the cop, sympathetically, despite the fact that the woman is clearly over the age of eighteen.
The man stands and talks with the cops for a minute. "Did you realize that you guys are right beside a playground, where there are children playing only a few feet away?", the cop asks.
The guy looks around for a moment and lights a cigarette with shaky hands: "I thought we were below the sight-line". "No", says the cop, "You were above the sight-line".
As they cuff him and frisk his pockets, he keeps saying polite, jolly things like: "Sorry 'bout this, guys", and "Well, jeez, I'm just real red in the face here".

Shows about cops? Still hot.
Shows about prison? On fire.

...Gotta make sure I don't spend too much time outside this summer, right? I don't want to go into "tan withdrawls" in the fall.

xoxo
~sarah p.

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