One Of These Things Is Not Like The Others:

Due to an overgrowth of trees in our neighbourhood, otherwise known as "dead baby bird central", I can't see the fireworks anymore, which means that my only forms of entertainment during Stampede are corn dogs, sheep in flamboyant unitards, and this game I play where I step outside my door, and try to decipher what concert is going on on the Stampede grounds, then I go look it up on the internet and see if I was right. I am just out of the range where I can hear things clearly, so it's kind-of like when I try to eavesdrop on someone's conversation at the airport or in the doctor's office, and I can't quite figure out whether they are talking about picking up salad at the grocery store, or some sort of deviant sex act. Believe it or not, Shawn Desmond, Loverboy, Snoop Dogg, and Dora The Explorer all sound about the same from a distance. I reward myself with marshmallows if I get it right, which is approximately 16% of the time. The other 84% of the time I admit defeat and drown my sorrows in, you guessed it, more marshmallows.

~sarah p.