Thursday, May 07, 2015

This Week In Minor Annoyances:

 *When a gentleman leans out his car window and yells "Bitch, let me lick those titties!". Like, what happened to manners? It's "Bitch, may I please lick those titties", dude.

*When people come up to Dexter and I and tell us we're the "cutest little couple" they know, like we deserve our own show on TLC or some shit. Actually, I'm just pretending that I'm annoyed by this one. TLC, get at me.

*When dudes dress in norm-core gear. Why put all that effort into trying to appear like you don't give a fuck? It's quite a bit easier to deck yourself out in super fresh gear than to dig in donation bins for Seinfeld-facsimile outfits. Also, the time is nigh: cool it on the scraggly beards, ya'll. If you want to look like you truly don't give a fuck about your looks, do it the old-fashioned way and become a father.

*When someone give you a free food sample of something and then waits to see your reaction to the product. What am I supposed to do if I hate it? Spit it in your face and crush your dreams?

*When power-tripping, no-bullshit bus drivers spend their entire shift tapping the "no food or drink sign" and sass-talking old Asian dudes that don't speak enough English to understand the rules. We get it, dude. You're the king of your bus. Also, FYI, historically, the bus is all bullshit and nothin' but, so don't even attempt to change the system. 

~sarah p.

p.s. Here is a bonus gallery of Kanye looking annoyed:

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